Humiliation/degradation
Posted: 10 Feb 2022, 08:13
I believe this to be a bit of a faux pas but none of the forums I have asked this on previously have given an adequate answer so I'm still unsatisified so to speak
what in the world is up with masochism
It makes perfect sense in my mind, why sadism can be deemed sexually pleasurable --namely its a power play, you can exercise control and illicit obedience and therefor respect from your sexual partner, makes total sense-- but then why do people (me included) derive pleasure from being treated as far less than we are? If sadism inflates a person then masochism would deflate a person yes? I guess you could point to something like an eodipal complex and propose the argument that some people just want to give up control. Sometimes I want to be the little spoon right? But then how do you explain the fact that people tie belts to the ceiling and hang themselves just to get off, or explain the existence/popularity of humiliation porn.
This is deeper than spankings, it HAS to be deeper than that. My current working theory is that when a person develops a worldview that they are weak and dumb and unattractive and overall undesirable, the whole love making deal doesnt really click, because your actions don't match with the deepest of your core beliefs (that you are a piece of shit)
So then when someone playfully/consensually treats you like a piece of shit in the process of lovemaking its like YES! FINALLY! everything clicks, everything makes sense, you slip into a state of cognitive ease (where addiction develops at an accelerated rate interestingly enough)
second option has to do with tendency to fantasize in what has been described as a "feminine" manner. To imagine that you are belle and you need to socialize/tame the vicious beast that you consensually "confront". I think they talk about this in the book "a billion wicked thoughts" but I can't remember its been years since i read it
Spitball. I know that im not the only one who wants to know why masochism is a thing
what in the world is up with masochism
It makes perfect sense in my mind, why sadism can be deemed sexually pleasurable --namely its a power play, you can exercise control and illicit obedience and therefor respect from your sexual partner, makes total sense-- but then why do people (me included) derive pleasure from being treated as far less than we are? If sadism inflates a person then masochism would deflate a person yes? I guess you could point to something like an eodipal complex and propose the argument that some people just want to give up control. Sometimes I want to be the little spoon right? But then how do you explain the fact that people tie belts to the ceiling and hang themselves just to get off, or explain the existence/popularity of humiliation porn.
This is deeper than spankings, it HAS to be deeper than that. My current working theory is that when a person develops a worldview that they are weak and dumb and unattractive and overall undesirable, the whole love making deal doesnt really click, because your actions don't match with the deepest of your core beliefs (that you are a piece of shit)
So then when someone playfully/consensually treats you like a piece of shit in the process of lovemaking its like YES! FINALLY! everything clicks, everything makes sense, you slip into a state of cognitive ease (where addiction develops at an accelerated rate interestingly enough)
second option has to do with tendency to fantasize in what has been described as a "feminine" manner. To imagine that you are belle and you need to socialize/tame the vicious beast that you consensually "confront". I think they talk about this in the book "a billion wicked thoughts" but I can't remember its been years since i read it
Spitball. I know that im not the only one who wants to know why masochism is a thing